Category Archives: mercy

Let go and let God

ps-3

Letting go and letting God, is a statement we have been hearing throughout our Christian walks. It sounds so easy, yet takes the grace to be able to fully accomplish. We say to ourselves that we have fully surrendered all to God. But have we really done so? Are there some things we partially surrender and are keeping to ourselves?

Time and time again we deceive ourselves and say we have gotten over something, yet the residues are still hidden within our hearts. We tell ourselves they are not there and cover it up. Other times we are not ready to deal with them and again pretentiously neglect them. Or, we accept that they are there and refuse to let go of them.

A couple of weeks ago, I was feeling troubled. I couldn’t pray, I couldn’t serve the way I would usually do and I had no peace. I tried everything to pin point what may possibly be making me feel this way. It was then that the Lord brought a friend of mine to my attention. As I envisioned this person, emotions of rage, pain, unforgiveness, bitterness and hatred came to my spirit. I remembered all the hurtful things this individual did to me, and the fact that they refused to apologize for it all. I had made up in my heart that I would “forgive” them but never “forget” what they did unless they had apologized.

Jeremiah 17:9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?

The Holy Spirit encouraged me to love her, and see her the way He sees her. So I started to pray for her. I prayed for God to change her, for her salvation and for God to remove the heart of stone etc. It was at this point that the Lord gave me a vision, and I was standing in front of a mirror. It was then that He revealed the bitterness, anger, hatred, unforgiveness, lack of compassion and mercy that was buried in my heart towards her. He then showed me my house and it was a total mess. He then told me: You cannot ask me to change someone when you have all this clutter within you. You have clean your own house before you clean another someone else’s.

Matthew 7:3-5 And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

It was then that I realized I had not surrendered everything concerning this person to the Lord, and was still holding unto it deep within my heart. Not only so, but the seed of bitterness had taken over my personality. My compassion and mercy for people had been taken over by this seed without me realizing.

We spend so much time focusing on how we feel and on the faults of others. We spend little time examining ourselves and the flaws we have. We are consumed with emotions. We forget how compassionate and pure in heart Jesus was. That even when He was being crucified, He prayed a prayer of compassion.

Luke 23:34 Jesus said, Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.

At times, we find it hard to forgive other people, but if God was to deal with us the same way, based on all the sins we have committed in our entire lifetime, we wouldn’t be worthy of receiving anything.

We are in a season where God is cleansing our hearts, our spirits, our households. The vision the Lord gave me was of a washing machine, and He said that He will use His Holy Spirit to cleanse and regenerate us, if only we are willing. My prayer for you today is that God will give you the grace to fully surrender all that is hidden in your hearts to Him and let go. He wants to restore you and make you whole again. I pray that You will get the courage to stand before that mirror and ask God to reveal all the things still hidden in our hearts that we still hold unto. Only He can heal you and make you whole again

dearlord2c0ahelpmeto0aletgoand0afullysurrender0atoyou-default


Let go and Let God – pointers

  • Make a list of all the things hidden that You have been unable to surrender to God.
  • Be honest with God about how you feel about situations you have been unable to surrender to Him.
  • Pray and ask God for the grace to surrender them to Him.
  • Pray for healing, deliverance and restoration with your heart, mind and spirit.
  • Imagine yourself standing before a mirror and ask God reveal all the hidden things within your heart that are not pleasing unto Him.
  • Pray and ask God to deliver you from these sins.
  • Use the word of God to speak positivity over these sins and replace them with positive words (e.g the fruit of the Spirit-Galatians 5:22-23).
  • Ask God to give you spiritual eyes to see His children the way He sees them.
  • Pray for God to give you a heart of compassion and mercy towards His children.
  • Ask God to give you a tongue that declares positivity over your life daily.

 


Let go and let God – youtube teaching

Compromising your faith

1454174354380

The decision to walk in uncompromising faith is a daily battle we have to face. The temptations of this world seem endless. It feels so good and yet it is so wrong in God’s eyes- the struggles of the flesh. The inability to choose between God and man- the battle of the mind. Walking the narrow road alone or strolling on the broad road with a friend- which way to choose? A temporary fulfillment on earth or eternal glory in heaven- patience. Willing to remain unpopular and gain everlasting recognition- long suffering. Is it worth letting you desires die to please your creator? – obedience.

I recently found myself in a compromising situation and had to choose between man and God. The pressures of this world and my emotions got the best of me. Acting upon this, I considered compromising my faith for a temporary situation. Thoughts kept rushing through my mind “God will forgive me anyways, His grace is sufficient” “This is not as bad as it looks, God will somehow find a way of blessing me in this”. Those were all lies from the pit of hell.

However, deep down in my heart I had no peace about the matter and continued pondering over it. Overwhelmingly, I turned to friends for advice: some supported my decision, others did not. What do I do? By the grace of God, a friend of mine shared a dream that she had about me. She did not know I had been battling with this decision. However, in the dream she had, I had made the compromising decision and my life was a mess. I had turned away fully from God and was unhappy. There was a lot shame over my life and I was alone.

I had a dream a few days later, where the Lord said to me “I am pleased with you, however do not make the compromise because it will ruin all the plans I have for you”. I then woke up. The fear of the Lord gripped me and gave me the strength to walk away from the situation and trust God.

Matthew 5:30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

It was by grace that God spoke to my friend and myself in a dream. However, what if He had not warned me, where would I be now? Especially, if I had made the decision solely on my emotions, feelings and the pressures around me. Not compromising my faith resulted in shame, pain, disgrace and losing someone very dear to me. I am thankful for this, as it was all temporary and in the long run has given me honour.

Matthew 5:10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Phonto.jpg

Hebrews 10:26-27 If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left,  but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God.


Compromising your faith- prayer

  • My prayer for us today is that God will forgive us for all the times we have compromised our faith one way or another. May God forgive us for when we have taken His grace for granted. Ephesians 2:8-9 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.
  • Let us repent for when we put our own desires before His and for the times we have been disobedient. May God forgive us for the times we have tried to please man and disappointed God. Matthew 16:26 What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?
  • May God give us the strength and grace to overcome the daily battles we face and not to give into the ways of this world. May He teach us to be selfless and let His ways be our ways. John 3:30 He must become greater; I must become less
  • May God forgive us for all the times we have been ashamed of doing His will and tried to blend into the ways of this world. Luke 12:8-9 I tell you, whoever publicly acknowledges me before others, the Son of Man will also acknowledge before the angels of God. But whoever disowns me before others will be disowned before the angels of God
  • May He continue to empower us as His children and remain courageous and bold to fight the good fight of faith. Luke 9:23-26 Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit their very self? Whoever is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.

12495210_1131812450170928_6236982226822226041_n

 

 

Why me?

1453022739779Why me? A question I repetitively asked myself throughout 2015. Everything that could possibly go wrong occurred. All that I feared happening in my life manifested. Why me? My prayers were not being answered the way I expected them to. Moreover, God was silent. Why me? Pain, grief, disappointmentFather where are you. Perhaps this was punishment for my former sins or maybe I was born to live a life of hardship. Everyone around me was having breakthroughs and my journey was getting harder- Why me?

I then found encouragement in the book of Job. Job was a perfect, wealthy, upright man that feared the Lord (read Job 1). One day, God gave satan permission to intervene in Job’s life and cause affliction.

Job 1:6-12 “One day the angels came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan also came with them. The Lord said to Satan, “Where have you come from?” Satan answered the Lord, “From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.”Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.” “Does Job fear God for nothing?” Satan replied. “Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land.  But now stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face.” The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, everything he has is in your power, but on the man himself do not lay a finger. ”Then Satan went out from the presence of the Lord.

One would ask, why would God do or allow such a thing? Isaiah 55:8-9 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,”declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

IMG_20160117_094138.JPG

The conversation between satan and the Lord was beginning of Job’s misfortunes and affliction. Job lost his cattle, his children, his honour all at once (read Job 1). What amazed me is despite this occurring, Job continued to worship God (Job 1:20-22   At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said: “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing).

However, this led to the Lord allowing satan to afflict Job for a second time.

Job 2:3-10 Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil. And he still maintains his integrity, though you incited me against him to ruin him without any reason.”  “Skin for skin!” Satan replied. “A man will give all he has for his own life.  But now stretch out your hand and strike his flesh and bones, and he will surely curse you to your face.”  The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life. ”So Satan went out from the presence of the Lord and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes. His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”  He replied, “You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.

However, this caused Job great pain and he repetitively cursed his existence on earth. Job 6:8-10 “Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant what I hope for, that God would be willing to crush me, to let loose his hand and cut off my life! Then I would still have this consolation— my joy in unrelenting pain—that I had not denied the words of the Holy One.

What did Job do to deserve great pain and hardship? In addition to this, he faced shame and even his own wife and friends rejected him during his time of calamity.

Job 19:13-20 “He has alienated my family from me; my acquaintances are completely estranged from me. My relatives have gone away; my closest friends have forgotten me. My guests and my female servants count me a foreigner; they look on me as on a stranger. I summon my servant, but he does not answer, though I beg him with my own mouth. My breath is offensive to my wife; I am loathsome to my own family. Even the little boys scorn me; when I appear, they ridicule me. All my intimate friends detest me; those I love have turned against me. I am nothing but skin and bones; I have escaped only by the skin of my teeth.

Although Job wallowed in self-pity, he did not curse God and Job passed the test of obedience

Job 7:20-21 If I have sinned, what have I done to you, you who see everything we do? Why have you made me your target? Have I become a burden to you? Why do you not pardon my offenses and forgive my sins? For I will soon lie down in the dust; you will search for me, but I will be no more.

lord2c0atestmy0aobedience-default

God  promises us that we will reap more than we have lost; all to the glory of His name.

Job 8:7 Your beginnings will seem humble, so prosperous will your future be.

And indeed after God’s purpose was fulfilled in Job’s life, He blessed Job with even more than He had lost out on.

Job 42:11-13 Then came to him all his brothers and sisters and all who had known him before, and ate bread with him in his house. And they showed him sympathy and comforted him for all the evil that the Lord had brought upon him. And each of them gave him a piece of money and a ring of gold. And the Lord blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning. And he had 14,000 sheep, 6,000 camels, 1,000 yoke of oxen, and 1,000 female donkeys.  He had also seven sons and three daughters.

When I made a list of the hardships I faced in 2015 and compared them to the affliction Job faced, it was incomparable. Let us ask God what lesson He is trying to teach us, what His plan and purpose is for the affliction, rather than complaining and dwelling in self-pity (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus).

Like Job, God knew that you would be able to handle the affliction, to pass the test He has set before you. He has placed a hedge of protection over you. No matter what hurdle comes into the path of His servant, you will jump over it victoriously. The book of Job also shows how powerless satan is, and that God Himself has the final say over your life.

Why you? Because God loves you and wants to use your life as a great testimony to others. Why You? Because God has installed greatness into you that will do wonders in His kingdom. Why You? Because you are His entrusted vessel who cannot be broken, and can withstand the challenges life offers. Why You? Because God was confident enough that you would overcome any misfortune that come your way. Why You? Because no plan of the enemy can destroy you, it only makes you stronger!!!

 

Trust God-not man

Trust God and not man. Easier said than done. The convenience of confiding in an individual with five senses, rather than a Father who at times is silent-inevitable. Trust in the unseen has to mastered in order to avoid misunderstandings, disappointments and paintotal surrender.

We place unrealistic expectations on humans, in particular vessels of God and are ‘stunned’ when they do not meet our “godly standards”. “If only the pastor could touch me, that would be the end of my problems”. “Did you hear about the pastor who slept with a member of the congregation?”. We thank God for pouring His spirit upon man and for the gifting’s He has blessed us with (Acts 2:17). However, just like the rest of us, vessels of God fall short and also have struggles. In fact, they need more prayers than we do.

It is becoming more evident that ungodly relationships are being formed within the body of Christ. Secret sexual relationships occurring between anointed vessels of God and other parties. Am I stunned? Not at all. Who is to blame? We all have a part to play. At times, men and women of God are unable to express their secret struggles- suffering in silence. Others have yielded to the pretense of being the ‘perfect Christian’ without flaws. Some are using their spiritual position to entice others, in particularly if one has not undergone deliverance before pursuing ministry. Many Christians desire a spouse that complements the ‘person on the pulpit’ whilst others fantasize of a lustful relationship with God’s anointed vessel. Others have been deceived by the anointed vessel.

Furthermore, the anointed man/woman of God may be dealing with more issues than you have knowledge of; hence why we need to turn to God first and not man. If God was to reveal to us what each and every man and woman of God was struggling with, you will realize that you are better of seeking matters directly with God. Does that mean that we should not seek after anointed people of God? No, not at all. But our primary trust should be in Christ Jesus and He should be the one we run to first. God wants to be your Father, confidant, your everything and will never disappoint you (Isaiah 9:6 “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace”).

1450680287926.jpg

Recently, an anointed man of God who does not personally know me told me that: “God told him I was his wife”. I immediately discernment his impure motives and indeed was offended by the pursuing: “How dare he, he’s supposed to be a man of God”. However, the Lord reminded me that we are spiritual beings, and have to deal with things in the spiritual realm (Ephesians 6:12 “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places”). And like any other human being, he also has shortfalls (Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”). By the grace of God, I put my emotions aside and  prayed for this man of God to be delivered from the spirit of lust and perversion and to pursue the ministry God has given Him in a righteous manner (Matthew 18:33 “Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?”).

My prayer for us today is that God will teach us to fully surrender and trust Him and not man. May God be the one we go to when we are in need and may He guide and order our steps. Let us pray for the men and women of God in ministry that God will continue to protect them from the devourer. May we acknowledge that they are not supernatural but fellow humans and have flaws and make mistakes (Ecclesiastes 7:20 “Indeed, there is no one on earth who is righteous, no one who does what is right and never sins”). May God help us not to judge people of God when their sins are exposed(Romans 14:12-13So then each of us shall give account of himself to God. Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother’s way”).May God give them the grace to confess their sins to the Lord and be overcomers.

trustgod0anotman0a-default

A prayer of healing

Can God really heal? I pondered on this question for most of my Christian life. Are the testimonies we see were people “proclaim” they were healed by the Holy Spirit real? Is the same God who healed in the biblical days still able to perform miraculous healings? One will never know the answers until they fully surrender healing to the Lord.

I prayed but the person still died, why didn’t God heal them? (Isaiah 55:8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD). In such situations, we thank the Lord that the individual has received eternal life and no longer has to suffer on earth.

Phonto

During the early days of my Christian walk, my father (see the blog post: Rejected but not forgotten) was diagnosed with a brain tumour. It was a very difficult time for me as I had just entered into adolescence and had only met him once at the age of 8. Growing up, I had a lot of resentment towards him for not playing an active role in my upbringing. I never expected that the next time I would see him that he would be lifeless using an oxygen mask. A few days prior to his operation, he called me and said “Vanessa, you are still so young and I didn’t see you grow up. I am not sure I will make it through this operation”. I remember spontaneously responding: “daddy you will be fine”. After the operation, we were informed that my father’s operation was successful and the tumour was removed.

However, he was in a coma and on life support. I was in the Netherlands at the time on holiday and my family took me to Universität zu Lübeck, Germany where he was. I remember seeing him for the second time after 6 years: tubes around his face and wearing an oxygen mask. I remember touching him and thanking God he was still warm and alive. I never knew that the next time I would see him; he would be in this kind of state. After the visit, my family sat me down and told me I needed to be strong and explained that the doctors where planning on taking him off life support the following week.

I remember thinking to myself: I refuse to be fatherless at this age, I want to have peace with my father. I want to forgive him, get to know him and give our relationship another chance”. At that point, I went on my knees, I don’t exactly remember the words I uttered. But I begged God not to take him. I grew up having a lot of bitterness  towards him for not being an active person in my life. I asked God to forgive me. My only prayer was that he would wake up, and that God would allow me to get to know him. I didn’t want my father to pass away without me ever knowing him. I never told anyone I said that prayer until recently. However, God was faithful and my dad woke up from his coma the following day and they took him off life support.

We went back to Universität zu Lübeck, and it was amazing seeing my father alive: talking, smiling and saying how tall I had become. Three years later, God fulfilled my prayer request and my father asked me if I could come and stay with him and get to know him. I stayed with him for 10 months. Less than a year after that, he passed away. I will always be grateful to God that He allowed me to get to know my father. It was not the most pleasant experience but it allowed me to fill a gap in my heart that I had desired for all my life. Also, I thank God for being merciful for extending his life for 5 extra years after the brain tumour- all glory to Jesus.

If there is a loved one you are believing God for to heal, don’t give up. Surrender them to the Father, He is still able. However, also acknowledge that it is His desire for us to join Him in heaven and that the greatest prayer You can pray for their salvation.

 dearlord2c0aipray0athatyouwill0aheal0amylovedone0aijn-default


A prayer of healing

Dear heavenly Father,

I thank You for everything that You have done in my life and continue to do. Thank You for waking me up today, for I know it was by Your grace. I come before You and repent of my sins. I repent for the sins I have committed knowingly and unknowingly. I pray that You will cleanse me with Your blood and forgive me. Today, I bring before you (state the persons name). Lord, I know that is Your desire for good things to happen in our lives (Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end). I pray Lord, that You will heal (state the persons name) in the name of Jesus. For in Your word it states that by Your stripes we are healed (Isaiah 53:5). I pray today that Your healing power will manifest in (state the persons name) and that they will testify of your goodness in the land of the living. I pray for (state the persons name)’s salvation, that they will acknowledge You as their Lord and saviour. I pray that You will deliver them from the hand of the enemy and may Your angels protect them from all evil. I speak Your favour over (state the persons name)’s life. I also pray that Your perfect will be done in (state the persons name)’s life and may it be all for Your glory. In Jesus name we pray, AMEN

Phono